A call for humorous research that the BMJ declined, and that nobody else has since known what to do with

Objective To offer a modest home for research articles written in the style of the BMJ Christmas issue, rejected by the BMJ Christmas issue, and then rejected by every other journal on the grounds that it was “not quite the right fit,” which is what journals say instead of “we didn’t get it.”

Design Open call. Non-randomised, unblinded and, in the interests of transparency, not peer reviewed by anyone at all.

Setting HEART, a narrative medicine publication in Singapore, where December is 31°C and the mince pies are imported at some cost to our dignity.

Participants Clinicians, researchers, students and others who have given up a perfectly good weekend, or in our case (many months) to analyse something faintly ridiculous, written it up with a pun in the title, and received an email beginning “Thank you for thinking of the BMJ.”

Intervention You send us your paper. We read it, which already puts us ahead of reviewer 2.

Main outcome measures Primary: Christmas cheer, measured on a scale from mild amusement to snorting into one’s tea. Secondary: closure. Exploratory: an explanation for why your paper was turned down while the one on the aerodynamics of sprouts was not.

Results In the spirit of leading from the front, we disclose that our own study involving chickens was rejected by the BMJ Christmas issue. We then discovered that no other journal keeps a section for chickens written in that particular tone of voice. Converting a festive paper into a serious one proved roughly as successful as passing off a Christmas jumper as business attire. We have therefore decided to publish it ourselves and would rather not do so alone.

Conclusions A paper that made its authors laugh deserves at least one more reader. Rejection is common, under-reported and, if handled correctly, seasonal.

Competing interests The editors’ chicken paper is in this pile. We have declared it, considered recusing ourselves, and decided against it.

How to take part

  • Send your paper to narrativesmedicineheart@gmail.com with the subject line “Return to Sender” by 30th November 2026.
  • Up to 2000 words, in BMJ Christmas format or a respectable approximation. Tables, figures and questionable methodology are all welcome.
  • Tell us where it was rejected and, if you can face it, what the reviewers said. With your permission, we may print the rejection alongside the paper, as is only fair.
  • If your work involves real patients, protect them: seek consent or remove identifying details. The joke should never be on a patient.
  • We’ll publish the papers we find ourselves quoting at colleagues throughout December, each clearly labelled as not peer reviewed.

The small print. Publishing on HEART may count as prior publication if you later hope to place your paper in a journal. Please send it only if you have truly made your peace with the journal route. We say this kindly, and from experience.

We read everything, and we reply. Even to the chickens.