On a recent trip to visit my parents in the Philippines, I found this painting hanging on the wall of their home. Its back bore my name and age - four years old, handwritten by my mother in her classic Catholic school penmanship. She gave us full freedom to paint “anything”. I don’t know why I chose mountains, but I froze because I did not know where or how to begin. Seeing my panic, mom stepped in. I remember the weight and warmth of her hand as it gently descended over mine, enveloping my small, tense fingers in her calm grasp. She guided my hand down toward the palette, showing me how to dip just my index finger into the pool of watercolor. Together our hands moved to the paper. With her steady hand cradling mine, she guided my finger to make small, deliberate strokes on the page. These are clearly seen on the top portion of the right mountain. They are light, rhythmic, and controlled. Then she let me go to finish the rest all by myself. My little hand was nervous and several times I stopped and asked her to put her hand over mine again. “No”, she said softly but firmly, “this is your project, not mine.”

I smile when I look at this now, more than fifty years later. I love how this piece has preserved my little hand’s attempt at art when the strokes were shaky, unsure, messy. In these mountains and clouds, I see my mother’s quiet wisdom - knowing when to hold a child’s drifting hand and precisely when to let go.

Denyse Ignacio is an occupational/hand therapist based in New Jersey, USA. She is also a student of Narrative Medicine at Columbia University. She is honored to restore function in human hands for a living and is passionate about patient and caregiver stories. Her 84-year-old mom still paints (with some OT intervention from her daughter).